Why I stopped praising 'good job' and what replaced it

"Good job" was my default response to almost everything my son did, until a teacher pointed out it praises the outcome without telling him anything about what specifically worked, which made the praise feel increasingly hollow to both of us over time.

What replaced it: naming the specific effort or choice, not the result. "You kept trying even when the tower fell twice" instead of "good job." The specific version seems to actually land, because he can repeat the described behavior next time, where "good job" gave him nothing to repeat on purpose.

He's started narrating his own effort out loud now, unprompted, which wasn't happening before. The specific praise seems to have taught him to notice his own persistence, not just wait for an outcome to be approved.

Part of the deeper dive: The Practical Parenting Guide: Bedtime, Chores, and What to Say Instead.